May 06, 2011

Aging Gracefully with Enjoyment

Happy Mother's Day to all you hard working mothers out there. This week's beauty is Tom Fernandes of HTR Construction who is 48 years old.

And guess what? Tom is my husband :-) He is also my very good friend and a great person. My partner in life. We met each other twenty-seven years ago while waiting for a subway at Park Street Station in Boston on a cold November night when I was on my way to meet a friend for a movie. During our conversation he asked me what movie I was going to see and I replied "Educating Rita, have you ever seen it?" but because of the noise on the subway he thought I said "Educating Rita, would you like to see it?"  To which he responded "Sure, I'd love to go!"  I had four stops on the subway to decide whether this was a good idea, or not...

Well it turns out that it was, and we have been together ever since. You know that intuitive voice that we all hear inside ourselves from time to time?  Well, that night, when I first saw him and before we even said hello, that inner voice said to me: "I wonder if this is who I am going to be with for the rest of my life?"

I kid you not.

Before Tom's tells you his thoughts on aging I want to say that I am so lucky to have him to ride with on the roller coaster of life- and the normal ebb and flow of being in an intimate relationship with someone for this many years. He is smart, and fun, and amazingly supportive of my inner voice.  He is the first person I go to when I am in a quandary because he is thinker and tends to see angles in life that I tend to miss because I am such a feeler. He is also a wonderful Dad to our kids, an incredibly hard working entrepreneur, but most importantly to me- he has a very soft spot in his big heart.

I bring you Tom:

" I'm at a point in my life where my priorities are about to change in a major way. I'm trying to get a high level view on what I have yet to accomplish and what I choose to take on going forward.

I've arranged my world around my family since Louise and I got married and decided to have children. As that challenge demands less and less, I'm free to choose some new endeavors and focus my time and energy on different activities. I'm going with enjoyment for a couple of reasons. When my body breaks down, and that could come suddenly, I don't want to have regrets about what I coulda, shoulda, woulda done when I was younger. Also, my mindset for many years has been dedication, commitment and sacrifice for the benefit of my family. I think it's a good time to lighten up, live a more conscious life and choose new things that I enjoy in addition to having a family. This will not be a sudden drastic shift. It's just my thoughts on preparation for a life without having to nurture children on a daily basis. This is what is next for me."

Thank you sweetie for being this week's beauty.
You are my every day beauty. xo