A Magic Formula

It has been a hectic few months and I have missed writing. I am growing much more comfortable with my new ADHD coaching staff position the last 4 months and am finding my way through other new transitions. Frequently when we are with self-doubt and anxiety over something new, it is simply because we are GROWING.

GROWING PAINS (remember a different form of these from childhood)?

Easy to forget this but so good to remember.

The magic formula that I want to pipe in about however is about fitness. What I have been noticing around me, especially with post-menopausal women, is that their heartrates aren't getting up high enough with workout routines, such as yoga and walking, for optimum fitness. There was a formula I learned maybe 30 years ago for getting the heartrate up. You may remember it. You subtract your age from 220 and then take 65-75% of this number to find your optimal maximum heartrate per minute.

So for me being 60-years-old, my maximum heartrate is found here:

220-60= 160 and then 65-75% of this is 104-136 beats per minute. Because I have been a life long athlete I always shoot for at least 136 beats per minute if not much higher

We should be getting our heartrate in this range for at least for 20 minutes, 3 times a week. This may be a slightly outdated formula but for me it has worked really well for years.

To find out what your heartrate is (right when you stop exercising), put a finger on your pulse at your neck and count how many beats you get for 10 seconds. Then multiply this number by 6 to see how many times your heart is beating per minute.

Also, another number to keep our eye is our BMI (body mass index). It should be below 25. You can find out what yours is HERE.

I also want to say that I have heard from 4 people recently that they are having good success with weight loss through intermittent fasting. Fasting for 16 hours and eating only for 8 hours each day. But keeping to the same schedule each day. There is tons of info on the web about this if you are interested and want to trim down.

Have a good long weekend everyone.

Louise 💗

Soothing Joint Pain

For over a year now I've consistently been doing a floor routine 3 days a week that takes me only about 12 minutes. It has really helped my whole body feel better (and stronger) and I don't have any joint pain. The other thing that I think is really helping me is laying way off the sugar, which causes inflammation (which causes joint pain). I saw this video from the Omega Institute (one of my favorite places on earth )that might be helpful to those of you experiencing joint pain. xo, L

T.A.O.S.

How many times do we need to cry but hold the tears inside ourselves instead?

Maybe we don't want to appear weak or too emotional

or perhaps, 

we fear breaking the dam of emotions that reside within us, because if we do open the dam, they may never end and overtake our lives, like a tsunami.

Or

if we cry,

it is truly acknowledging that something is really hard or isn't right.

But it's normal for feelings to be hard and to struggle.

When we settle into challenging feelings being okay and good to have,

we're more able to see the light, and the lessons and move on to a more peaceful place.

This I've learned.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * 

One of things about my mom's upbringing was that her mom was bi-polar and because of this, the emotional climate in my mom's childhood was a hard thing for her to navigate. 

Who would my mom come home to after school? 

Her exuberant mom?

or her mom who could easily get overwhelmed with emotion and be in bed for days? 

Later in life, in protection of these childhood memories, my mom learned to sweep hard emotions under the rug and carry on stoically. It's not that she never cried, because she certainly did, but she was more apt to hold tears in and carry on like a trooper.

This childhood coping skill became her emotional protector in life, when raw, uncomfortable feelings and situations surfaced.

Because of my mom's childhood, she unknowingly taught me to suppress my own tears when I was young. I learned from her that a few tears were okay, but I also learned, to buck-up and carry on.  

Which in many ways, may have served me well the past few years, as I NAVIGATED THE ASYLUM. Sometime I felt that if I had cracked the hard shell protecting my heart and let the tears out more than I did, the tsunami might have drowned me, with its force.

But what I am learning now, as I make my way further, is that tears are our strength. Letting hard emotions out, helps us to process and heal. They allow us to be vulnerable and emotionally connect with others. 

Tears allow us to access our truth, and share it, which can have an intimate domino effect with others.

Kind of like a healing circle.

Let our tears come.

Let them water our souls.

Let them heal us and be our strength.

For further reading on Lines of Beauty: 

CRY YOURSELF A RIVER

❤️in love, 

Louise

Humor & the Gifts of Aging

We forget some of the things that we are grateful and willing to give-up, along the aging journey.

Jane Caro reminds me a little of actress Emma Thompson.

She shares, most importantly amidst her humor, "Stop whining about getting old. It's a privilege."

So so true!

Whilst folding the laundry etc, enjoy.

xo,

Louise

Notes To Self

Every so often I like to reread this list I made many years ago, when the blog was young, titled "10 Easy Ways to Age Gracefully Today".

I am re-titling it now to "Ten Easy Ways To Feel Better Right Now" :-)

I haven't looked at this list during my tumultuous last few years and I wish I had, as it holds some good Louise truths and reminders.

The good news is that I am rising from the muck, and things, in so many ways, are on the upswing. But more on this in the future, as it's not the easiest of stories to share.

So here is the list again. For me and for you <3

• If you can't change it, move on.Thou shall not stew.

• Stop getting stuck in your story about woulda. coulda. shoulda. and get on with doing what you love to do.

• Surround yourself with loving, low-maintenance people who increase your vitality instead of rob it.

• Remember that aging is part of the wondrous cycle of life. It is normal and it is what is suppose to happen, just like getting our baby teeth.

• Take care of that pesky task that has been hanging over your head for way too long. It won't take nearly as long as you think it will.

• Have an orgasm.

Did I just say that?

• Stop worrying about what other people think. It's your life.

• Don’t forget that human's greatest emotional need is to feel appreciated. Acknowledge someone.

• Get over your fear. Fear is normal, so embrace it and then you can move past it.

• Take care of yourself physically, emotionally and mentally. Be your own best friend. It is the foundation for a good long life.

Photo by Jef Bettens, Limburg, Belgium

Midlife Unraveling

Brene Brown wrote an excellent, and very timely, article this past week about the midlife crisis/transition.

Be sure to share it with anyone you know who is struggling or knows someone who is, as I do.

She is amazing. Click here to read.

In love and in peace,
Louise

Quieting the Voice

I returned from my trip to Cuba on Thursday to growing concerns about the precarious health of someone in my family. For me it has been a year of worry and great concern about a multitude of things that life can unfortunately throw at us.

It has also been a year of realizing that I truly don't have control over much, except my thoughts and where they wander, as well as taking very good care of myself.

Last night I eased myself into the pool and Cried Myself a River. I remember when my Dad passed away, almost 17 years ago, that the shower became this oasis for me. The pool wasn't nearly as private of course, but I discovered that allowing myself to wail, whilst swimming, was so very cathartic.

I'd been holding onto the tears for days, trying to be the strong woman, I fear not being.

I believe that letting the tears come, allowed me to sleep like a baby last night, with the comfort of my mama's soft, red plaid, fleece blanket, wrapped around my naked and very frightened inner child.

Let our tears come, let them water our souls.

May we step into the light,

even when it is raining.

22 Minutes to Bliss

Along with doing more yoga, I've been searching for meditations to help me relax and this one is really wonderful. It sent me right into slumber land.

I hope you are all well out there.
In love, peace and health,
Louise

The Best Medicine

Another great video from one of my favorite people, Christiane Northrup, in the field of women's health.

Dr. Oz also discusses the health benefits of orgasm here. 

Natural medicine that doesn't cost a penny :-)

Nourish

The two emotions that mess us up the most are fear and anger.

We can't be grateful and fearful at the same time, as we cannot be grateful and angry simultaneously.

But what can we find in fear and anger?

This I know- there is a lot to be learned in times of struggle.

We just need to be patience with ourselves, to get to the other side, so that we can see it.


With the election now within arms reach and so much uncertainly and fear in the air-

what can we do to nourish ourselves?

How do we step outside our heads and breath in optimism and gratitude?

How do we nurture ourselves with more nourishing thoughts?

We can't change the chaos in the world but we can change what we listen to and reroute the thoughts in our heads. Change the channel, as I like to say.

We can change who we are in the midst of chaos.

So today, I turn to gratitude and creativity.

Today I choose health and happiness.

Today, I choose love.
 

Inside of Us

Last weekend I took a solo journey to Kripalu, while Mr. Fix-It was away. I had never been to Kripalu and was curious to spend some time there, especially since I've been doing more yoga lately.

It had been a long time since I ventured off on my own like this. I don't think I've ever been alone for 3 days, even though there were plenty of other people there. It was a bit scary heading out, but also exciting to be doing it.

What was it going to be like to just be with myself for 3 days?

Who am I when everything else is not there?

Frequently lately, I've been craving more time alone. I've needed to cut the engine and stop taking care of what sometimes seems like a gazillion things and too many people.

I bet this rings a bell with many of you, nurturers that we are.

It turned out that I really liked the solitude, as I thought I would.

I stayed in a non-snoring dorm room with about 20 other women and decided to eat all my meals in the silent dining room. It was actually a relief not to speak with anyone unless I chose to.

One of my favorite things that I did all weekend was take a two hour paddle boarding class, where 12 of us paddled out into the lake, laid down on our boards and mediated among the lily pads and geese, while drifting back to shore. It was divine.

Peace and tranquility.

I found what I went looking for.

And a little bit more of me.

The Things That We Don't Know That We Don't Know

Sitting here beyond mid-life now, it's apparent to me finally what the gifts are that I was given.

Here is the question however, what gifts have we all been given that we aren't aware of because we haven't yet discovered them?

Like the things that we don't know that we don't know.

Maybe one of the best things about aging is discovering parts of ourselves that we have yet to uncover.

If we will only step out and allow ourselves to reach for them.

Perhaps I am a good pastel artist and I don't even know it because I haven't picked up a pastel since I was in grammar school.

For all of us, one of the gifts that we were given is our voice. The ability to speak the truth for ourselves. To say what it is that we are yearning for. To tell it like it is and not mask who we really are and what we want.

Our voice however takes practice as we are sometimes afraid to speak up and share our truths and opinions with others.

The energy to speak is located in our 5th chakra of self-expression.

It is where my energy gets blocked the most I know. When my voice changes pitch it is a warning that I am stressed about what it is I need to say or do.

Or not do.

Sometimes what I really need to do is stop doing.

I know you know what I'm talking about.

Sometimes we need to turn off our phones and shut out the world so we can slip away from the all the pings, and dings, and rings and see what else might happen.

Like the things that we don't even know that we don't know.

Putting It Down

It has been said that we have 60,000 thoughts every day.

Gosh is this true?

It has also been said that 90% of our thoughts are the same thoughts that we had the day before.

This I believe. I can see why it is beneficial to read books, seek different experiences and meet new people.

It's refreshing to change the channel in our heads and get rid of the thoughts that don't serve us. We all know the ones I'm talkin' about.

What thoughts in our daily mental chatter can we put down and lay to rest?

Kind of like a fall cleaning for the brain.

One of thoughts that I can put down is that I wish I was smarter. I wish I could talk about practically anything but I can't.

The other day I went to my first hot yoga class ever. I don't like hot weather and have resisted going, like the plague.

I thought I wouldn't like it but I loved it.

It felt like I was in a cocoon of rejuvenation- to stretch and sweat like I have never sweated before.

What a wonderful thing it is.

Thank you to Alyssa Hale for this week's inspiration.

Nestle's Boost ~ Simply Complete

The 15 and 30 second commercials for the docu-ad that I am in are finally done. 

Hallelujah!

The longer version is still being completed but I thought I'd share these two for now.

The swimming scene was shot at Walden Pond in Concord, MA, where I love to swim when I have time.

I was so stunned to see myself the first time I watched these. For some reason I was expecting to be surprised by the footage but it looks very much like how I remember it being filmed.

I'm just relieved that I don't look like I have on as much make-up as I did.

I'm also so relieved that I don't look as nervous as I felt the first morning of filming, in the periwinkle t-shirt.

So here it is-

I bring you Nestle's new Boost product, called Simply Complete:

Our Greatest Strength

As I await the release of the energy drink docu-ad that was filmed of me at the beginning of June, I've had some moments of feeling vulnerable. I'm mostly excited to see it but a little voice of anxiety pops up in me occasionally that I have to quell and remember to just trust the process.

Really is it so terrible if I look and/or sound bad?

As my friend Cindy would say, we need to keep our spirits with us in the front seat, not our egos.

In this clip, Brené Brown says she was raised, like many others, to believe vulnerability is a weakness. In fact, she says, we can't have true courage unless we open ourselves up to vulnerability. Watch to find out why sharing our feelings— is the only way to dare greatly in life.

Living As We Can

I've begun seeing a Chinese acupuncturist for a UTI that I haven't been able to shake since last April.


I haven't been in pain- my urine just doesn't smell right. I've tried many things including two different types of antibiotics, reducing sugar and lots of remedies off the shelf at Whole Foods.

It was time to take the holistic health route, instead of more antibiotics.

The first thing the acupuncturist did was ask me many, many questions about my health and lifestyle and requested that I eliminate alcohol and sugar altogether.  

WHAT? No more glass of wine at night- the one that I've been having, like clockwork, since I was 28?

I should have seen this coming.

It's now been 5.5 days without and I am missing alcohol and sugar less and less. I feel like I am focusing better. Not so ADD'ish.

I am enjoying observing the changes within myself.

BUT I miss my bits of dark chocolate happiness throughout the day, as well as cutting the engine at night with a glass of wine.

She has suggested room temp water with lemon wedges instead, especially the rind.

The other thing that she requested is that I am asleep by 11PM every night as the body starts repair itself soon after this.

We really are aligned with the moon and the sun.

She also said I need to slow down,and have more time for healing, and for myself.

This is much needed I know.

I am being challenged by the 11PM bedtime (as usual) and slowing myself down.

Baby steps.

Trying to be more mindful, which is easier without the wine.

All around, already feeling a little better I think.

xo

In The Throes

God I love this quote. Every time I remember it it sets me at ease, especially this time of year when so many of us are in the throes of the holiday season.

I race tomorrow so this has to be quick. A quick post and a quick race.

There is that perfectionism again.
 
But truthfully, there isn't anything like sprinting 50 meters of freestyle for me. The energy outlay. The life energy. Life force. Blowing all my physical gaskets at once. When I can stay on top of my fear it can be a very powerful thing. Mentally, emotionally and spiritually.

I imagine that some of you can relate to being an athlete but perhaps mastering fear is something everyone can relate to or at least the struggle of it.

I leave you with this dear readers of mine.

xo

Last F**kable Day

This week's post is a humorous video from comedian Amy Schumer with the best of the funny girls. If you haven't seen her movie, Trainwreck, it's very entertaining.

Thanks to Ronnie Citron-Fink at Econesting for posting.

More later! I traveled the long journey between Boston and Pittsburgh this week to drop our 2nd born at college and am getting my legs back beneath me.

xo!

Pull Out Your Hankies

This posted on Youtube on Thursday and understandably already has over 2 million hits.

Clearly one of my favorites ever.

Many thanks to Jules for sending it in.
 
Sniffle sniffle...

P.S. If you'd like, please share to social media on my buttons 2 lines below.

Forty Photos in 40 Years

We were down in the Bahamas this week for a few days. Trying to escape the 4+ feet of snow in our yard and the below zero temperatures. However, we arrived to a land having strange weather all its own. The first day it poured. The second day, a wind storm rolled in but luckily the sun shone brightly. The third day it was cloudy and the coldest day the islanders had seen in seven years (62 degrees). It was so cold for them that they ended bus service early that night because they knew that no one would be going out!

It was nice to get away however and cut the engine on regular life and just drift.

It was also nice not to wear my hiking boots for the first time since the holidays...

I've been meaning to post this photo project that my sister sent me of four sisters who were photographed together, every year, for forty years. Perhaps you've seen it but in case you haven't here is a link in the NYTimes to all forty pictures of them together.

It's so interesting to see people morph physically. Both visually, as well as the energy that they radiate.

Morph...don't think that's quite the right word but you probably know what I mean.

As author Susan Minot notes, what is interesting is how the four sister's body language changes with one another as the years move along.

It's indicative of how much more grateful we are for loved ones as we grow older.

You  might want to turn your speaker down (or off) as I think the music is kind of haunting unfortunately. I enjoyed the video more without it.

XO