October 02, 2012
Turning the Boat Around
Many years ago, when I was going through infertility, I went to see a therapist named Norm Ephraim, who specializes in negative thought. Thanks to him, I am acutely aware now when I have negative thoughts or those around me do. I don't think negative thoughts are necessarily a bad thing, in fact, I think they can be very helpful in small doses. They can be arrows pointing us in what direction to go in next. They are part of what it is to be human.
It is unfortunate, however, when we get swept away with negative thoughts, and allow them to flatten us. We can get caught in a child-like state, and stuck in "our story", when bad thoughts permeate us. Negative thoughts bring us down, and sometimes paralyze us, and can even make us sick. They are contagious- to ourselves and to those around us. Kind of like when car wheels get stuck in mud and just spin.
Kind of like worrying.
I know personally what it is like to get caught in the web of anxiety. If we can't do anything about a situation, the healthiest thing to do is to just let it be, until we have something new to lead us. It's important to be patient, and have faith, that we will always chose the best thing for ourselves.
There is no sense in letting our thoughts drive us crazy.
Negative thinking can turn some people into complainers and although complainers can be entertaining for a time, after awhile I think most of us just want to say:
Enough already! Change the channel. This is so not uplifting. You sound like a broken record.
Turn off the mental masturbation.
And turn the boat around.
When we can step outside our heads, there are so many things in life to enjoy.
We all have the power to control what we think about.
Carly Simon's song below, although basically about the slow and steady fire, says it perfectly:
Take a look around now
Change the direction
Adjust the tuning
Try a new translation
... And you feel closed in by the same four walls
The same old conversation.