Whatever it is that we are yearning for in life, it is almost always ourselves that get in the way of what we are after. One possible road block is when we allow our short term choices and impulses to derail our long term desires. This is normal, we just need to get back on the horse.
And the faster we get back on, the less we will fall off.
Years ago I heard about the concept of "baby time", which are those moments when we worry that our needs aren't going to be met. Imagine a baby, totally dependent on someone else to meet its needs. For instance- think of hungry babies that need to be fed. They have no idea if this need is going to be met- so what do they do? They freak out and scream to let their mother know their needs. As we mature this is rarely the case, but we can so easily slip back into "baby time" and make poor, snap decisions because of it.
The key is to step back, take a breath, and trust ourselves to stay in alignment with achieving what we really desire. It's partly about learning how to better mother ourselves.
This week, my friend Brenda Stanton, who is a lifestyle and business coach ( Claim Your Worth), made the distinction between the words "choose" and "want, which I think is very helpful:
What sparked the conversation was when I said – “I want”. He said, “How about you change that want to the word CHOOSE – I choose.”
He went on to explain that using “I want” is like a kid in the cereal isle who wants the cocoa puffs and is having a temper tantrum because Mom or Dad is saying no – you can’t have them.
This is often how we feel when we want something but feel like there is a power outside of ourselves telling us we can’t have it. It makes us feel very small, helpless, and powerless.
My mentor explained that this inner child needs our love, attention and nurturing for sure – but we don’t want to stay steeped in this drama-filled place too long.
This is when we want to elicit our Higher, True Self – and where the word CHOOSE comes in. Rather than say “I want” and believe what you desire is outside of you, simply say I CHOOSE. I choose health. I choose loving relationships. I choose abundance.
Can you feel the shift within yourself when you use the word Choose vs. Want?
The key is to realize that we are human. We have younger parts that are afraid and need our attention. Yet, we also are Divine, whole, powerful and bigger than anything that comes our way. The goal is to balance – not perfectly – but to balance the interaction and integration with these two parts and allow your Higher Self to have more air-play in your mind – even if its only 51% vs. 49% of your younger self – your Higher Self still wins out.
This week your soulwork is to witness how powerful you feel when you change “I want” to “I choose”."
Thank you Brenda!