When I'm Sixty-Four

When I get older, losing my hair
Many years from now.
Will you still be sending me a valentine?
Birthday greetings, bottle of wine.

If I'd been out till quarter to three
Would you lock the door?
Will you still need me, will you still feed me,
When I'm sixty-four?

My oldest brother Fitch, who lives on Bowen Island in British Columbia, turned 64 this past weekend and his daughter Jasmine made him this sweet clip to honor the year. Paul McCartney and John Lennon's When I'm Sixty-Four runs the first few minutes of it.

Happy birthday Fitch and to all you other end of November, early December, babies out there :-)

Aging Gracefully On Slender Threads

This week's beauty is Kay Moates who is 66 years old.  Kay is a lifelong dancer & teacher who also creates a line of beautiful hand knit shawls called On Slender Threads.  Made of  luscious fibers and earth gems, Kay specializes in wraps for all the transitions and celebrations in life including marriage, birth, illness, and mourning. Her shawls empower, ground, and delight.

Etchings
By Kay Moates

My entire story resides in these lines . . . lines on my face, lines on my hands, lines on my sagging body, even I’m guessing, lines on my heart.

Probably I’m on the fringe, maybe even the edge, about many days in one’s life. You see, I didn’t know my grandparents and to this day still feel slighted. There’s an empty space within me from not experiencing their embraces, words, and personalities; also, from not breathing the same air with them. Oh, long have I looked at their wizened faces staring at me from familiar shaped heads, knowing eyes, and silent lips. Living in their gene pools I could sense their wisdom sparks but photographs didn’t fill the void. This not knowing gave me a different perspective from our culture’s views/pressures/lack-of-teachings about aging. Sounds strange even to me, but at 16, I was wishing to have white hair as I aged. Got that wish in my thirties.

As a young adult, I found Sulamith Wulfing’s work The Transition. It is a powerful symbol/truth holder companioning my way as each decade asks me to make changes either physically or energetically. Some are slight, others massive. Mostly the massive ones have been soul shifts, radical new topography offering release of obsolete patterns. Done in my 30’s, 40’s, 50’s, and now my 60’s these shifts are teachers softening my opinions, waking me to the moment, adding time to my day, and giving me my self. Wonder if modern psychology will ever offer retrieval of our inner elder?

The unspoken truth behind denial about aging is our culture’s extreme fear of death. Death is the other side of the living coin, the kiss between two consciousnesses. It’s as natural as each line that marks me. Here I am a new Grandmother late in my days, yet early enough to leave vibrant memories speckled with wisdom . . . where my many etched lines are signs of wonder, streaks of mystery, keepers of stories, harbingers of hope.

Kay's shawls are available on Etsy and Craft is Art.

On Slender Threads is also on Facebook.
Thank you Kay for being this week's beauty.

Happy Thanksgiving

I wish I was this far along with Thanksgiving preparations but I'm not yet ( the photo is from a photo site). But the pumpkin pies are in the oven as I write this and I wanted to stop and take a break from the party prep and wish you all a happy Thanksgiving.

If you are traveling I hope you travel safely and enjoy your time away, and if you are having family and/or friends to your home, I hope you have a yummy feast, and a nice time welcoming loved ones.

My sister has said that having guests brings fresh air into our homes. I think this is so true.

I leave you with one of my favorite poems called Wild Geese by Mary Oliver.

Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours.

XO,
Louise

Aging Gracefully with the Love of Art

This week's beauties are some of the ladies from our 5th Annual Holiday Trunk Show which was held at my friend Jayne's beautiful & very crafty home last week. Every year we usher in the holiday cheer with a two day festival of handmade works of art, food & wine, and fun.

This year's holiday market featured four artists, including Anni Mackay from the Big Town Gallery in Rochester, Vermont, and yours truly The Hole Thing.

Be sure to click on the above collage to capture all the treasures.

Many thanks to Jayne and Doon for the photos.

Holiday Promenade

Photo by Claudia Meyer    Paris, France

As we round the corner to the busiest, merriest, but also what can be the most unhealthy time of the year, I thought it might be good to remind ourselves to take-it-easy as we start scrambling to prepare for more than a month of putting ourselves in high gear once again.

The seasonal stress of getting it all done is now at our doorstep. Not to mention the lack of time to sleep and exercise, and the constant onslaught of holiday food and cheer- as my physician so perfectly describes as being "a cookie in every corner." I love that.

Aldra, my humorous cyberspace friend on the left coast, has a great post about the Holidaze on her blog Consciously Frugal to help put it all in perspective.

And be sure to get out for a holiday promenade with your buddy or sweetie to take in nature's healing beauty & to remember what life is really all about.

To capture all of Claudia Meyer's splendor click on the photo above.

Ou la la :-)

Aging Gracefully with the Layers of Life

This week's beauty is knitwear designer Kristin Nicholas.  Kristin is also an artist, and the author of seven books on knitting & embroidery. She lives on a sheep farm in western Massachusetts with her husband Mark and their daughter Julia. Kristin and their home have been featured on Martha Stewart as well as in numerous publications. She also has a great blog called Getting Stitched on the Farm, and a very colorful and fabulous website.

I'm happy to introduce you to Kristin, and her thoughts on growing older:

"My theory on aging is to not really think about it. It seems like I was 30 just yesterday. Where did the time go? What did I do with all those years? Now I’m starting to think about my life in decades, not single years. The 20’s, the 30’s, the 40’s and now the 50’s. The one thing I do think about every once in a while is how the heck am I going to fit in everything I want to do and learn in the next year or the next decade?

Getting older has given me more layers of life and experience. I remember something my octogenarian friend Charlotte said to me one day when I was visiting with her at a party attended by family and friends. We were watching the kids play and she said “Oh, I wish I was your age again and knew as much as I know now.” Her comment has stayed with me a decade later. I think it is great way to look at aging – to see the layers of experience build up and make you a more complex, interesting, intelligent person. Aging is about life experience – whether good or bad.

The first time I saw a photo of myself with creases, I was shocked. I had just spent a couple years taking care of my daughter who was born with hydrocephalus. I became a mother just a couple months short of 40. We were in and out of Boston hospitals and doctors’ offices for multiple surgeries and follow-up visits. I hadn’t had the time to even look at myself, nor worry about what I was doing or accomplishing with my life for over two years. My husband and I were just trying to take care of Julia and get her better with the help of the doctors. In between it all, I had written a book on embroidery for children. My friend John Gruen, the photographer, was taking my photo for the back flap. I looked at the Polaroid (that was back when there was film and Polaroids) and I said to him, “When the heck did that happen?” He told me I had earned them and they looked good. I love that way of looking at wrinkles – that they are earned. They are nothing to worry about – they just are.

If I am fortunate to have lots more time on this earth to get more wrinkles, I will count myself a very lucky woman. I don’t think I knew that when I was 30 but I do now.

Thank you Louise for making me think about this."

You are welcome Kristin. Thank you for your contribution! Looking at your photos makes me want to go knit :-)

Pretty

This piece grew more and more fabulous the longer I watched it.

It had me in tears.

Katie Makkai, you are terrific.

Bravo girl.

I want every teenage girl and woman to see it.

And every male too.

Thanks to Kamala for unearthing it.

Aging Gracefully with Humor & Insight

Be still my heart…

This week’s beauty is Lines of Beauty’s first guy:

Kevin O’Shea.

Make that Kevin Patrick O’Shea.  He looks a bit like a younger Burt Reynolds don’t you think?  He wore green in his photo in keeping with his Irish heritage.  I love that.

Kevin is a wonderful soul who came into my life with his rich Irish humor, great human insight and musings, honesty, and his gift for words, when I was just a young gal. Most importantly though he is a very good friend with whom I'm never at a loss as to what to talk about. When my Dad died and we needed ushers for his memorial, Kevin was the very first person I thought to call. That just goes to show how much I love him.

On this note, I bring you Kevin and his thoughts on aging:

"There was an old tavern on Main Street in Niagara Falls...Bramer's.  Absolutely nowhere to sit down. No tables and chairs and in fact no bar stools.  A shot and a beer joint that conveyed the message clearly: NO WOMEN ALLOWED.  Surely women can appreciate the times where they'd prefer no men.  Exercise class, Pilates...getaways etc.  When Louise first asked if I'd be a beauty of the month, yes I felt a little sheepish but mostly I was concerned she'd have a mini insurrection on her hands. I've been following Lines of Beauty since she started it and as insightful and informative as it is, it's definitely a woman's site.  I'm an interloper. That said I believe Louise is wise enough to know her readership and if she feels a curve ball is good now and then...so be it.  At my next Teamsters meeting the chance to list "Aging Beauty of the Week" among my credentials is too irresistible.

1). I'll confirm what’s already known.  There's not 1/1000 the pressure on a man to attain and maintain a standard.  Other than health and the self generated motivation to" not let one's self go completely" there's precious little pressure from media and mass culture.  I haven't experienced the opposite of this, only observed it.  Yes, I feel lucky....it's liberating I guess.

2).  That said, we do age and naturally notice it in a variety of ways.  Humor is a good tool.  I'm convinced at night I'm lifted away by fairies, leprechauns and assorted wee folk.  They carry me to my front porch and compress my face on the wicker furniture.  They bind me in vines and have mini switchblade fights.  That's the only plausible explanation for the changes in my face.  But if these merry men take such delight in transforming my face who am I to take issue with the changes?  Aging is a gift not everyone receives.  I'm at ease and well satisfied with the ongoing process.

3).  If I knew then what I know now:  I have a physical job.  If one of my co-workers told me in 1984 that they practiced yoga on a mat I would've thought they were inches away from shaking a tambourine at an airport.  I acknowledge the ignorance of this. My son Michael is 20 yrs old and a serious practitioner of yoga.  I'm certain it will serve him well.  As for me, it's never too late to start but I'm still trying to rely on above mentioned humor to get me through the aches and pains. Not as effective.

4). That which doesn't defeat me only makes me stronger:  Yes.....in every area but stress.  This axiom has so much merit in so many applications.  Conquering a fear whether rational or irrational.  Making it through an anxiety producing first day of a job.  Accomplishing a physical feat that seemed beyond my grasp.  Stress however, is deceptive.  One never actually conquers it, only manages it well or poorly.  I was almost masochistic about functioning and fulfilling my responsibilities under stress.  Thought I was growing stronger but stress's effects are accumulative and corrosive.  Make changes in life if there's an imbalance. Aging has given me the clarity to see certain truths and the peace of mind to trust my instincts.

5). I will state on those rare, perfect occasions skinny-dipping is one of the most beneficial, mental, emotional age reducers I can think of.  Talk about thumbing your nose at Father Time and not conceding an inch.  The perfect antidote for emotionally feeling old.  It's benefits linger for months beyond the moment.

6). Finally...an observation/comment on the fairer sex and their aging process.  It's presumptuous but please indulge me.  I think women who have a close relationship with nature tend to fare better in the aging process.  This is a generalization. Women who garden and hike etc. have an earthy appreciation for nature's changes and therefore may be more accepting of their own changes. Don't get me wrong, I love it when women (like my wife Rhonda) get dolled up to borrow a term from Sinatra.  Some cultures elevate this and certain social stratas and professions require this polished appearance.  Beautiful. No complaints. I just think if you can't transition to the earthiness of getting your hands dirty or working up a good workout sweat, you're lingering in rarefied air.  Then it becomes artificial and natural aging is more fearful. Just a thought.  I welcome any contrary or enlightening views."

Kevin, from the bottom of my heart, as they say in Ireland, go raibh maith agat   :-)    

Help, Hope and Healing

This past weekend I had the honor of being interviewed about Lines of Beauty by my lifelong friend & soul sister Cynthia Brennen on her radio show Help, Hope and Healing. This photo,circa 1978, is of Cindy and me senior year on deck at our high school swimming pool.

Two fish out of the water goofing around as usual :-)

Cindy is a mind, body, spiritual and emotional wellness therapist and each week she interviews a new guest on her very inspirational show. This week we covered such topics as the positive sides of aging, and the physical, mental and emotional aspects to aging gracefully & enjoying life. Plus, several surprise topics thrown into the mix :-)

If you'd like to hear the interview you can easily download it to your computer, or to your iPod -so that you can go for a walk one of these glorious autumn days and enjoy the show.

To access the interview simply go to Cindy's website and in the 3rd column under "AM-WWLZ 820 Talk Radio" click on Lines of Beauty.

And have a good week everyone!

Aging Gracefully With Children

This week’s beauty is Kamala Madhu.

Kalmala and I were lucky to meet recently through a mutual friend who I went to high school with and with whom she went to college. Small world. Kalmala, has college-age children, has been teaching nursery school for thirteen years and is a former president of the PTA, not just once, but twice.

Kamala has this to share about growing older:

For me, it's all about accepting how you look and who you are. I come from a family of women that don't do much to enhance their natural beauty, such as it is. I do wear make-up occasionally, but have never dyed my hair or even plucked my eyebrows. Writing this has made me wonder whether it's a matter of principle or the path of least resistance!

I still feel young in spite of my graying hair-I actually really like the way it looks. Working with young children keeps me on my toes. Occasionally the children will comment on my gray hair and say, "You look old!” but to a three year old, almost everyone looks old.

I have a relatively young mother (72) who has been an inspiration to me. She found a new path after her children went to college, becoming a professional photo archivist at the Eastman House in Rochester, NY, traveling extensively with my father, and gardening.  Her latest project has been keeping chickens-she loves them!

I am fifty and have never had a problem telling people my age.

You are as old as you are.


Thank you Kamala for being this week's beauty.

Coming Around Again

I swam competitively for the first time in 30 years on Sunday morning. The day started off on the wrong foot as I anxiously awoke at 4:22 AM, more than two hours before my alarm was set to go off. Then I got in the shower to shave and cut my legs in three places…which made me a bit late for the warm-up at the pool.

But by the time I got on the starting block to race I was relatively calm and my finish time was less than 5 seconds off my best time ever. I am determined to improve my time at the next meet.

Masters Swimming is a national program for anyone over the age of eighteen. Sunday’s swim meet featured about 115 racers including an 84-year-old woman racer, and an 80-year-old man! So fun! Men and women race against each other, and it’s a great community event. Plus, you can join Masters Swimming and you don't have to race.  It’s a good program for those who just want to swim for fitness too.

Returning to racing felt like going to a reunion of sorts for me- except all the people and the swimming technology are different now. I guess it was more like a reunion with myself!  Being under water is one of the most calming and centering things I have ever done. Kind of like yoga, for fish :-)

The photo above is of me 32 years ago. I'm hoping that I can get my arms at least half as strong as they were back then at this ripe old age of almost 50.

It’s gratifying to circle back around to things we once loved to do but moved away from for whatever reason.  Maybe it’s a sport, but perhaps it’s playing the violin or singing, or writing, doing art, being in a play, or learning a language that we once loved.  After college, parts of all of us get put on hold -or even forgotten about- as we start jobs and/or families, but it reconnects us with our souls to unearth them again. And, it adds a new dimension to our lives.

I’ll keep you posted on my progress...

 

Aging Gracefully With Photojournalism

This week’s beauty is Robbie Kaye. Robbie is a photojournalist and is currently working on a book and exhibit called Beauty & Wisdom from her travels around the country photographing and interviewing women in their 70s,80s, and 90s in beauty parlors.

The women in Beauty & Wisdom live in a culture where the beauty of youth is hugely valued but the beauty of age is often ignored. In the beauty parlors across America, this fading generation of women share their humor and wisdom, as Robbie learned in New Orleans when Mrs. Guste, 88, who lost every piece of her jewelry when her house was looted during Hurricane Katrina, reminded her, "everything is borrowed and when it goes away, it's time to give it back."

Here is what Robbie has to say about growing older:

The older I get, the more privileged I feel about living each day and having the opportunity to learn and work on mastering this thing called life.  I spent over 20 years as a musician and songwriter and when I was 43, I fell in love with photography so much that I decided to study it.  That was 8 years ago…when I went back to school for English and photography.  I was twice the age of my fellow classmates but I wanted to learn so much that it didn’t bother me and because it was fine with me, it was also fine with them and it was one of the best experiences of my life.  I learned that instead of being afraid of something, like academics or failing, that I actually thrived in it and enjoyed being in school, learning, reading and relating to others in literature and art. At age 44 I had the honor of being on the Dean’s List, an accomplishment I never even dreamed of.

The universe is a tricky one, with lots of goodness in store, and now I find myself combining the two subjects I studied and love to do, photography and English. As I work on my photojournalism project, “Beauty & Wisdom,” I am grateful for the opportunity and the learning from such great professors on my path. I tell you this because I want others to know that they can start a new career at any time, at any age…it’s never too late, to discover your dream and then follow it.

Congratulations Robbie on creating such an exciting and important story.

Below is an interesting clip of Robbie's project in the making.

What's Love Got To Do With It?

I am just finishing reading Slow Love-How I lost my job, Put on my pajamas & Found happiness by Dominique Browning. I have been savoring each page, and I'm sad to have it come to an end.

Dominique is in her fifties and lost her job as editor of House & Garden when the magazine folded at the end of 2007.  Like so many people lately, she was suddenly out of work. At the same time her children had left home, and she ended a long love affair, as well as sold the home that she thought she would live in forever.

Having lost my knitwear design job after sixteen years in 2007, I can relate to suddenly losing the main thing that she so accurately says “defined her days, paced and regulated her life.” She had feared losing it for many years, and when it happened, it nearly flattened her. With the busyness of her work gone, she was left with plenty of time to think about life, which she writes about with bold honesty and humor. It is like reading someone’s diary.

I especially like her quote of Adam Nicolson’s from Sea Room:

“At the back of that hurry is the knowledge that it is a screen against honesty.”   

That is one powerful sentence.

Slow Love is about living life more slowly. As Dominique says, it is “the love that comes of an unhurried and focused attention to the simplest things, available to all of us, at any time, should we choose to engage…..Perhaps even importantly, slow love comes out of the quiet hours, out of learning from the silence that is always there when we want it.”

Slow Love is about finding peace. It's a great read.

Below is an interview with Dominique on CNN about Slow Love, which might be especially interesting to any of you who have lost your job, or are close to someone who has.

Still Doing It

I came across this entertaining preview of the film (and book) Still Doing It, which is about women continuing to enjoy sex after age 65.

This is very encouraging :-)

Who says that as the years go on we have to work harder to create the magic?

Plus, sex is as important for our health as eating well, exercising and sleeping writes Dr. Christiane Northrup.

Dr. Ruth says, "Times are not easy-so put your worries outside the bedroom door, and make sure that you engage in some wonderful sexual experiences."

Keep it coming Dr. Ruth :-)

The ABC's of Aging

The ABC's of aging from Cottage Style Living comes in two sizes. I have The ABC's of Life  in the bathroom just outside my studio that Gray Gorgeousness gave me as a gift a few years back (see below).  It's a good reminder.

PERSPIRE WITH APLOMB.....I've been trying to find the enjoyment in these power surges...sometimes I almost can when it's cold outside :-)

I also like QUIT WHINING.

Hope you're all having a good week.

Aging Gracefully with Style

This week’s beauty is Abby Forestall the principal and owner of Embellishments located in Lexington, MA.  Embellishments believes the image you project can positively affect your personal well being and career success.  When you feel good about how you present yourself, and you live/work in pleasant, inspiring and well-designed spaces you feel better and accomplish more.   

A few years ago Abby designed my knitwear studio top to bottom and did such a great job that it was featured in 2009 spring/summer issue of Studio Magazine.

Abby has this to share about aging:

Growing Old…Maturing…. I think more appropriate, Getting Better.

I don’t know about you but the older I get, the busier I become, yet the slower I am in a way.  I stop and think about things more.  I take a breath and notice what a nice day it is or what is still blooming.  I love to look up and see the tops of trees against the sky.  Sounds silly doesn’t it but the older I get the more appreciative I am.  I am lucky enough to have one of the best men as my adoring husband for over twenty-five years.  He is my support, my “business coach” and my mentor as well as all those other things you count on in a partnership raising two children.  I started my own business as an interior decorator/style and wardrobe consultant over 5 years ago and have achieved a client base of over 50 wonderful clients and am now starting my second year as President of one of Massachusetts’ premier Business Network International (BNI) chapters in historic Lexington.  In this world where so much is amiss, and there is so much misery, I think we all need to step back and be ever more thankful of what we have, what we have become and hold on to what we know the world can be.  Do what you can, appreciate those that do more and always, always look forward.

For more information about Embellishments and the services it provides please call Abby at 781.608.5634 or visit their website at AddStyleToYourLife.com

New For Fall

With cooler air arriving for most of us, I thought a quick glimpse into the fashion trends for fall 2010 might be timely.

Being a lover of knitwear, I am always curious to see what is new and exciting each season. Fashion is a great way to embrace aging, as many women really begin to understand their personal style.

And it's fun!

Plus, the other great thing, especially this year, is that we can sometimes recycle pieces from our closets from years past that have come into vogue again & just need to be reworked a bit.

So what’s hot for fall 2010?

• Bold colors: Red, purple, blue, and olive (and also camel).  Scared of bold colors? Try pairing them with a neutral.

• 50s silhouettes, classics like capes and ponchos, pattern mixing, faux fur, military looks, sweater dresses (oh la la), menswear inspired belted jackets, velvet and velour, sleek turtlenecks, wide legged pants with volume, and shimmer for daytime and sparkle for night.  Also layering is still big which is helpful in covering lumps and bumps. And guess what else?  Long skirts are coming back (great for covering the veins in my legs :-0 ).

I always like to see what Michelle Obama has been wearing and thought you might enjoy this slideshow.

Also, I have two very good books on style to introduce you to and a video clip below this post from Marie Claire about fall fashion trends with Tim Gunn.

I got these from my local library:

• My favorite guy- Isaac Mizrahi’s How to Have Style. 

•  Kendall Farr's Style Evolution- How to create an ageless personal style in your 40s and beyond.

 

Top Five Fall Trends

Aging Gracefully with Filmmaking

This week’s beauty is Laurie Schur who is the creator of the documentary The Beauty of Aging. Laurie is also a Clinical Social Worker, is happily married, and is a mother and grandmother. She is 65 years old.

Laurie has this to share about growing older:

“Over the years I have noticed - for myself and as a therapist, I have added a spiritual dimension to my life and work. I focus less on exploring the problem and more on the solution and a broader perspective on how to deal with what I now call challenges instead of problems.

My decision to create The Beauty of Aging was out of a desire to explore a differently creative aspect of myself than the creative skills used as a therapist. Because my mother died before her 64th birthday and she was an unhappy person, I was drawn to explore aging in my film and to find women who could show the way to a better and happier old age, despite their challenges. While I've been a seeker of truth, wisdom, healing and knowledge all my life, I think as I've aged I am better able to integrate what I learn and have a stronger intention to “do the practice”.

I strongly believe that one size does not fit all - that lessening the judgment of myself and others is an important part of the journey and I am more willing to do that now then when I was younger and was more fixed in judgment - at least I catch it now and work to release it.

I think that whatever makes someone happy and doesn't hurt others is okay - e.g. - some want gray hair - others color their hair - some feel good about wrinkles - others feel the need to "fix" them. While it would be great if we could all feel great about ourselves, both internally and externally, I don't think I can judge how people deal with such issues - especially given the influence of families and culture on such things. And - I work to release the hold of the external pressures and to remember that beauty really is - for me - not what someone looks like (though, of course, we are all attracted to different standards of beauty) - but that energy, spirit, vitality, attitude, interest in life etc. are the true things that create beauty - like the women in my film The Beauty of Aging exude.”

Botox Me Not

  

I keep reading more and more about Hollywood’s latest take on botox, especially casting director’s, who no longer want to hire frozen, robotic looking faces. This is such great news seeing how they are at the forefront in our media of what is put before our eyes as examples of beauty.  Even Julia Roberts has come forward recently saying that she never wants to have plastic sugery. Recently in Elle magazine she explained, “I want my kids to know when I'm pissed, when I'm happy and when I'm confounded. Your face tells a story and it shouldn't be a story about your drive to the doctor's office."

Julia, congratulations. You will go down in history as one of the first women in Hollywood to take a stand and set a great example not only for your own daughter, but for young girls and women everywhere.

A few month's ago there was another good article in the New York Times about the change in tide in Hollywood.

I leave you this week with a pictorial of aging actresses at More Magazine. 

I think Annette Bening looks especially fabulous :-)

Aging Gracefully with Simplicity

This week's Beauty of the Week is Jennifer Prince Bronstein.

What are Jennifer's words of wisdom about aging gracefully you might be wondering?

"Everyday is a surprise worth waiting for."

Short, sweet, and so true.

Thanks Jennifer.

The Art of Aging

Below is a wonderful clip that I have been wanting to post for awhile of artists Richard and Alice Matzkin. The Matzkins realized, as they began to enter middle age, that if they didn't change their attitudes about aging they were going to be very unhappy. So they decided to use their art to heal their fears and negative views about growing older. What was born is a beautiful book called The Art of Aging, Celebrating the Authentic Aging Self.

I will say no more as their interview speaks for itself. Take a minute to watch it. I promise you won't be disappointed.

Celebrating the Authentic Aging Self

Aging Naturally

This week's Beauty of the Week is Gail Lewis Lord. As Lines of Beauty's second guest blogger, Gail has written a great piece for us about growing older:

Rarely do I believe I am “growing old gracefully.” I struggle with the same insecurities all women face when we look in the mirror and see our own mothers staring back at us.

I am a 63 year old, divorced mother of three grown children with three grandsons, who is retired but still not sure what I want to do with the rest of my life. Currently, I volunteer at the Umlauf Sculpture Garden and the Lady Bird Wildflower Center, consult on marketing, keep up many friends, read and travel. Frankly, I do not know how I ever had time to work! But I treasure my alone and down time. Learning how to love my own company has been one of the greatest gifts in my process of maturing gracefully.

I have also learned there are no magic potions or bullets to change the course of time. We are all largely products of our genes and environments, whether we like it or not. For example, my genes dictated that I would turn gray in my 20s. At first, it just looked like my hair was heavily frosted -even my hairdressers thought so.

That first year I fought turning gray with every hair color product available until I turned my hair GREEN! Thankfully, a hairdresser was able to reverse my coloring disaster. But that experience cured me of trying again. My hair was even resistant to beauty parlor products. Forced to accept my silver locks, I embraced them, and never looked back. Friends say my hair is my crowning glory; I am blessed and grateful to have good hair. Complete strangers stop me on the street to tell me how beautiful they think it is. But life is full of good hair days and bad hair days.

Another lesson learned is that our emotions are inextricably connected to our bodies and that stress can kill. We can suit up and show up, and do our best, but that is all we can do. Trying to control how others think or act only causes us stress. Coping with this reality is an ongoing challenge, but I keep trying. I’m not as hard on myself anymore if I don’t succeed.

Over the years, I have been blessed with wonderful, supportive friends, without whom I probably would not have survived. For me, maturing gracefully is an ongoing process of appreciating those friends, self-discovery, acceptance, gratitude, and curiosity about life. And it doesn’t hurt to have good hair!

Extending The Story

Like some of you maybe, I was born into a family with much older siblings. The photo to the left is from 1961 of my sister Sarah, who was nearly ten at the time, and me, on vacation in Cape Cod.  For as long as I can remember, Sarah has been one to seek the truth, and examine what resides under the layers of life. This is one of the things I appreciate most about her.

Sarah of course is one of my biggest supporters of Lines of Beauty, but because we are so different in some ways, her thoughts carry her to topics for this blog that I might not ever travel to.

So today I introduce Sarah Becker, my first guest blogger, whom I’m grateful, once again, for peaking under the layers:

"I think about Lines of Beauty often.  I wonder about the possibilities for stories that talk about the territory between recognition that one is aging in some way at any given moment and accepting the process of aging as it appears at that time.  Actually it's not about accepting the process of aging because having to "accept" it sees it from a negative stance from the beginning.  It's about understanding the transition one is in at the moment and looking forward to change, no matter what it is.  But I think I can say that because I have come to this understanding with time and experience.

I’d like to hear those specific stories from women which would tell us more about the internal processes we go through in change - more than optimism and "can do".  Because I think that the most optimistic of us have times of needing a good talking it through with ourselves to move ourselves along toward growth and realization.  This process of aging happens any time in life, as we comprehend the changes and stages of our lives - really from the earliest years.  We start by seeing it as "growing up", becoming adult, and then so often it's "oh no, I'm going to turn 30, 40, 50, etc."  One hears the dread around one all the time as people we know turn specific ages.  Where is the welcoming of wisdom and experience, of moving forward?

But it is broader and deeper than that...what am I doing with my life?  What needs to change?  What can change? How do I have to see differently in order move myself along?  How do I understand my living-self knowing that some day my life ends?  All of us hit roadblocks or stagnation in this process but something moves us along to get to the other side toward new understanding.

So while aging can be seen from the point of view of our bodies and spirits and beauty, it's really about moving through the life cycle.  We inhabit our bodies from the beginning.  They come to define so much of living.  I'd like to hear the stories of our minds and hearts, and yes, of our bodies too - all within the crunch and grind and breath of life."

More about Sarah here.